Album: Shel Silverstein

Everybody says I'm paranoid
They all think I'm crazy
They all smile to my face
But they'd like to see me die.
They put poison in my coffee.
They put ground glass in my oatmeal.
The put spiders in my tennis shoes
And shit in my pecan pie.

It's hard to stop and figure out
Where did it all begin.
You see, my father wanted a little girl
And my mother wanted twins
And my grandpa admired Hitler,
So everything I did was wrong.
And I'm gonna stop now
Cuz even though you're smilin',
I know you hate this song.
Yeah... and I know you're only listenin'
Cuz you don't want to hurt my feelin's
And you're just waitin' for me to leave
So you can laugh about my open fly.

You put the poison in my coffee.
YOU put the ground glass in my oatmeal.
YOU put the spiders in my tennis shoes,
And you shit in my pecan pie!
I know!
Don't deny it.
I know...
I KNOW!
I know.

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